Thursday, 12 May 2011
When I woke up this morning, I had initially planned on moaning about the realities of life; how it’s so impossible to succeed at anything and how even with great effort, it seems the best I can do is to just barely keep my head above water (this even applies literally – I’m a terrible swimmer). But, a couple of hours later, I realized that no one likes to read about self-loathing, unless it’s done in jest. Instead, then, I’ll do something that’s generally considered equally repugnant yet, somehow, more readable: I’ll just brag.
At the end of class today, the professor passed back our Connections Projects. These projects are worth 20% of our grade. I received an A on this project – on the final page, the professor even wrote, “Dude, you’re like my best student ever, LOL!” Just kidding. But he did write “The research is comprehensive and impressive. The writing is graceful and highly readable…This is excellent all around.” Oh yeah!
The great thing about this is that this means I’m heading into the final exam (which takes place on Monday) having accumulated all the points so far available. I have only missed five points this semester – two on the first exam and three on the second exam – but I scored an extra point on two assignments for doing outstanding work and just last week I turned in an optional assignment, which garnered me another three points. So, I have over 100% in the class right now. The final is worth 20% of the grade, which means that, even if I don’t show up to take the final, I still end up with a B.
(Well – that’s not exactly true. Not showing up to take the final would mean I haven’t done all the work for the class, giving me an ‘Incomplete’ for the class.)
I can only recall two other times in college that I’ve gone in to take the final exam with better than a 100%. This is good. As long as I get at least 50% on the final, I get an A in the class.
Bragging done.
Also (and I only mention this because it is of trivial pursuit-style importance), as of today, Queen Elizabeth becomes the second-longest reigning monarch in British history. Though Wikipedia’s calculations seem to indicate this milestone won’t be reached until tomorrow. If I was British, I would be saying, “Long Live the Queen!” but since I’m American, I’ll just say, “When in the course of human events… (and it just goes on like that for a long time, Thomas Jefferson was really quite the rambler).”
Friday, 13 May 2011
How about, instead of talking about my day, I tell you something my wife and my son did? Okay, I will.
My wife visited the Mall of America today. As is our custom, she parked on the Florida level, near Bloomingdale’s. Pushing Isla in the stroller, she walked through the hallway connecting the parking ramp to the mall and went in through the glass doors. There, in the all-glass entryway, was a bird fluttering around, trying to get out. The bird kept smacking against the glass and then falling down. Birds generally do this until they’re dead.
We’ve seen this before – including just a few months ago. On that day, Owen and I kind of chased-slash-cornered the bird and funneled it down the hallway and out into the ramp. I guess Bloomingdale’s can’t afford decals to put on the window that would allow trapped birds to at least see they shouldn’t slam up against said panes.
Anyway, so my wife went back out to the car today, grabbed on of our reusable canvas bags, then walked back over to Bloomingdale’s, waited for the bird to flutter down to the ground, then threw the bag on top of the bird, cupped it inside the bag, and then brought it to safety.
Meanwhile – at Kindergarten, Owen passed out temporary tattoos (at least, I think they’re temporary – oh man, we’re gonna be in big trouble if they’re not!) to all of his classmates while they sang “Happy Birthday” to him. Tomorrow is his birthday, incidentally. This, of course, brings to mind all those years when I was in elementary school and the kids passed out treats that they brought in for their birthdays. But back then, I recall the students all receiving cookies or cupcakes or some kind of candy. One year, a kid’s mom brought in a cake with a space theme, and there were little space shuttles and moon rovers on it, and I subsequently collected them all by trading with students for crap I had in my desk. Yeah, so, all that junk food. That might partially explain why my generation is one of extreme laziness and morbid obesity. The powers that be at Owen’s school, on the other hand, have requested no junk food, so his generation will be one loaded up with stickers, crazy pencil toppers, and temporary tattoos.
At least, I think they’re temporary.