{"id":484,"date":"2010-04-19T22:46:35","date_gmt":"2010-04-20T03:46:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/?p=484"},"modified":"2010-04-20T14:00:26","modified_gmt":"2010-04-20T19:00:26","slug":"whats-the-deal-with-punctuality-unitarians-facebook","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/2010\/04\/whats-the-deal-with-punctuality-unitarians-facebook\/","title":{"rendered":"What&#8217;s the Deal with: Punctuality, Unitarians, Facebook?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>17 April 2010<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Once again today, I showed up early. Well, technically, I wasn&#8217;t early; but I was earlier than nearly everyone else.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m not sure, exactly, what happens in my mind that puts me in a different time zone than everyone else, but it goes something like this: I get an invitation to go to someone&#8217;s house at 5:00. So, thinks I, it will take me a half hour to get to their house, plus maybe another ten minutes in case I need gas or in case I make a wrong turn and have to turn around. So I plan to leave the house at 4:20. But wait! I&#8217;ve learned through the years that no one shows up at someone&#8217;s house exactly on time, so I give myself some leeway: I&#8217;ll leave at 4:40.<\/p>\n<p>So all day I&#8217;m looking at the clock: It&#8217;s 2:00, do we have time to run to the grocery store first? It&#8217;s 3:00, maybe I should go inside and take a shower. At 4:00, I&#8217;m pretty much ready to go, so I sit down and read a book or check my email. Around 4:30, I stand up, put my shoes on, encourage everyone else in the house to meet me at the front door (as appropriate) and, at approximately 4:38, I am turning the key in the ignition.<\/p>\n<p>It turns out, I DO need gas, so I stop and pay at the pump. Then I&#8217;m on my way. I knock on the door at 5:04 &#8211; for an event slated to begin at 5:00 &#8211; and, guess what? I&#8217;m the first person to arrive. This wouldn&#8217;t be so bad except the host wasn&#8217;t even expecting anyone yet &#8211; they&#8217;re still vacuuming, or their waiting for their spouse to get back from a last-minute errand at the corner store. So I stand in the kitchen with the host and chat, and maybe help get things ready. At about 6:15, other people finally begin arriving, and no one seems to care that all involved have been so woefully incompetent. Except me.<\/p>\n<p>If you don&#8217;t want me there until 6:15, then SAY 6:15. I, apparently alone among my peers, have my life in order.<\/p>\n<p><strong>18 April 2010<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Today, we attended the <a href=\"http:\/\/firstunitariansociety.org\/\">First Unitarian Church in Minnecrapolis<\/a>. This, I think, is the fourth time we&#8217;ve attended their services (it&#8217;s also where I delivered my presentation on the Winter Solstice back in December). Jennifer arranged for us to visit a couple of closer (READ: not in Minnecrapolis) Unitarian Churches last summer but, apart from that, we pretty much only go when we&#8217;re invited.<\/p>\n<p>As far as churches go, they have the smallest percentage of crap. By a wide margin, actually. There&#8217;s a hymnal book made up of <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Cat_stevens\">Yusuf Islam<\/a> tunes (as far as I can tell), many rituals that leave me privately asking WTF? every five minutes, and the occasional references to Him,\u00a0 but, otherwise, it&#8217;s fine.<\/p>\n<p>Today, their main discourse focused on evolution and the importance of caring for our planet. I think it was a tie-in to Earth Day. Regardless, it was interesting, inspiring, and a kick-ass substitute for the &#8220;Special Talk.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The thing is, I don&#8217;t get it. As my friend Ryan once said, the Unitarians welcome people of all faiths and religions, but as I retorted: if you do belong to another religion, wouldn&#8217;t you attend that religion&#8217;s services instead? Also, if these people have accepted the facts about life and don&#8217;t ascribe the unknown to a whiny deity, what&#8217;s with the religion? Why not just get together and have lectures?<\/p>\n<p>As always, we were <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Love_bombing\">love-bombed<\/a> upon entrance. Even before we could check to see if our friends had arrived yet, a greeter at the door was handing us packets of information and encouraging us to enroll our son in their Sunday School Program &#8211; a program that continues into his teenage years. We took the paperwork, but I was more concerned with showing Owen the playroom than with setting up a 10-year plan for his religious education. The religious education program, incidentally, calls for a Bible literacy program from 3rd through 5th grades. I personally think my son, at that age, will still be a bit young to read a book of such wholesale violence, sexuality, and immorality. Conversely, the program &#8220;Dealing with Death&#8221; is set to begin with 6th grade, which is, evidently, eight years too late for Owen.<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, I don&#8217;t mean to knock the good folks at the Unitarian Church. If you need religion, go there.<\/p>\n<p><strong>19 April 2010<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Have you heard of <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Facebook\">Facebook<\/a>? It&#8217;s like, all the rage. It&#8217;s kind of like <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/MySpace\">MySpace<\/a>, only it doesn&#8217;t take 15 minutes to load a single page, and it does not assault you with poorly encoded images and sounds.<\/p>\n<p>Facebook is another thing that I don&#8217;t get.<\/p>\n<p>Okay, so I get the appeal &#8211; it&#8217;s fun to check my page and see who has posted new things lately: who has a new job, who found a cool new site, who is getting married &#8211; stuff like that.<\/p>\n<p>But it&#8217;s become this weird thing. When I first joined, I sought out a few of my good friends. Then &#8220;friend requests&#8221; started coming in from more peripheral people: cousins I hadn&#8217;t seen in years, ex-coworkers, and even people I&#8217;ve never actually met in person. The first time this latter request occurred, I wrote back saying, &#8220;Hey, no offense, but I have no idea who you are.&#8221; He replied with a few facts that &#8216;proved&#8217; why he and I were relevant to each other, and so I figured I&#8217;d friend the guy. But when he posts things like &#8220;Cruising to Onamia to check on Kathy,&#8221; I have no clue what sort of benefit that&#8217;s conveying to me.<\/p>\n<p>Then there&#8217;s the idea of commenting on and &#8220;liking&#8221; someone&#8217;s post. It seems weird that our interaction with each other has become so artificial, that we don&#8217;t even have to type &#8220;That&#8217;s cool&#8221; any longer. We can now just click a button that does it for us &#8211; as if we are just THAT busy.<\/p>\n<p>I also don&#8217;t get the level of interest shown to certain comments. Here&#8217;s a rough breakdown of the four types of comments, offered as archetypes, with accompanying estimates on the number of comments each will receive (and, yes, there are exceptions):<\/p>\n<p>1. BIG DEAL: I will be performing on stage at the State Fair on Sunday, if anyone wants to support me. (0 comments)<\/p>\n<p>2. KIND OF A BIG DEAL: I bought a new car today. (2 comments)<\/p>\n<p>3. NOT A BIG DEAL AT ALL: It&#8217;s raining out and I don&#8217;t feel like cleaning today. (4-10 comments)<\/p>\n<p>4. SOMETHING I DON&#8217;T EVEN WANT TO KNOW: I just farted. (12+ comments)<\/p>\n<p>And then there&#8217;s this &#8220;defriend&#8221; option. It&#8217;s kind of a way to diss someone without offering any reason and without requiring the backbone to say &#8220;I hate you&#8221; in person. First, this one person I knew from my teenage years requested my &#8216;friend&#8217;ship. So I accepted. About a month later, I made a post, she commented, I responded, and then she evidently felt that was reason enough to conclude our rekindled virtual friendship. We weren&#8217;t even arguing. Then another guy asked to be my friend, I accepted, but then he defriended me, only to re-friend me some months later. We had no contact &#8211; in person or electronically &#8211; during that span of time.<\/p>\n<p>Last week, another person I knew from way back asked to be my friend and, again, I accepted. A few days ago, she said she was gonna be having dinner with her Dad, so I commented &#8220;please give him my regards.&#8221; Now, her Dad is a Witness, so he probably wouldn&#8217;t want to hear from me, but I have nothing against the guy. Also, his daughter is not a Witness, so she couldn&#8217;t have been offended at my comment. Still, today, whilst checking Facebook, I see she has de-friended me. I&#8217;m not sure if it had anything to do with the &#8220;say hi to pop&#8221; comment but, if so, wow&#8230;touchy. If not&#8230;then what?<\/p>\n<p>But do I really care? I mean, it&#8217;s cool to see pictures of people I knew 20 years ago, to see how they&#8217;ve grown, who they married, how many kids they have, and where they live&#8230;but do I really need them back in my life? What&#8217;s more, if they are someone who IS in my real life (such as my coworkers, my close friends, and my wife), then do I really need to &#8216;connect&#8217; with them on Facebook?<\/p>\n<p>I tried to check Facebook again about a half hour ago. It said I need to put in my password. I did. It said that my password was incorrect. It says this everytime. Sometimes I just have to type it in like 5 times before it accepts it. Tonight, I didn&#8217;t retry.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>17 April 2010 Once again today, I showed up early. Well, technically, I wasn&#8217;t early; but I was earlier than nearly everyone else. I&#8217;m not sure, exactly, what happens in my mind that puts me in a different time zone than everyone else, but it goes something like this: I get an invitation to go [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-484","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-current-events"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=484"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":486,"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484\/revisions\/486"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=484"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=484"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/zimmerscope.com\/Verbisaurus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=484"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}